Mom,
Wow great to see all the new photos! I can say that it makes me smile to see them. I know mom that you don’t like Halloween all that much, but I am sure it was great to have the family participate in all the activities. I had myself pondered a little bit the night of Halloween, as the kids and adults here in Colombia dressed up too! Haha I wasn’t all sure how the holidays are here, but it’s a tradition here too. The music here isn’t creepy or anything like that (to imagine what the music is like- just imagine Mexican music). They didn’t play any scary music, but they dressed up and asked for candy in the street. Some of the houses had decorations, but very few. Anyways, I was thinking back about a year ago when I was at Knots scary farm with the Dowden’s and Elder Kennedy. In that moment it seemed like yesterday, but yet a lot of time has passed. I also got to thinking about how much things have changed with holidays and such, but what I remember is the time with my family on the holidays. After working 3 three hours in the night, I cooked rice with chili :).... It was the first time I have cooked rice in my life! I was proud of myself. I will send photos later of it. All the visits we had, got canceled because everyone was outside asking for treats, but we still passed by anyway. I like the picture of you and dad supporting BYU. Were those your outfits? Ryan and Brooke have a pup! Will it grow much or stay the same? How old is it?
I have so much to write today that I want to tell you which has been on my mind. First off mom, I want to thank you for sharing with me your thoughts because it has given me insight to what I can do to have more faith and more confidence in the Lord to help me. I believe I know a lot of things, but in reality have not been applying what I know. So much is needing to get done in one day and its seems to be always the same routine for me day in and day out. Lessons, lesson with members, references, contacts all that and goals we want to complete in the week. I can say that at times we have reached our goals, but more time we have not reached our goals, we are always a little short. I am trying to work well with my companion and yes be his best friend and serve him when I can. I am growing better relationships with the members here in Mogambo because I have more time here. The thing that I feel is a struggle, is the language in total. I am always trying to let you know how well the work is or how I am feeling, but then again I don’t want to tell you what I am struggling with. Something that I have been reminded of from Elder Smith, from my district in the MTC, is what our president Watkins told all of us; we will never speak fluid in the mission. I feel at times there is a wall between members and investigators at times. When I arrived here I felt not included in a lot of things. I can tell you I felt distant from the spirit, because for six months I didn’t understand anything in the church meeting of in the scriptures. I tried to read in Spanish and so forth. I had so many expectation of the mission before and now it’s changed to something totally different. I have a year in the mission and everything is so much harder than I imagined. For example I would like to continue explaining more of what I am feeling, but I have five minutes to write to you or I will be disobedient with the one hour on the computer. I spent thirty minutes having to do all the little things that the mission tells me to do...to send information, print out all the papers and so forth. I am only a missionary and I have no role in leadership and it is so much. I can’t imagine what it’s like for others to have other positions. Really I don’t know what to say......I feel stressed, less than happy, I don’t know.
Elder Ridley
I love you all so much.
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